1. You Have Had To Dry-Clean Your Tuxedo Or Evening Gown Before A Holiday
Formal nights create a great sense of occasion on board. While getting your tuxedo dry cleaned may not be classed as typical holiday preparation, it is a must if you’re heading for the seas. Ladies, whether you reach for your favourite cocktail dress or hit the shops in search of a full-length showstopper, prepare to wow and to be wowed by the attire on display. Don’t forget your diamonds, darling!
2. You Packed Far More Than You Needed Because You Knew You Could
If you’re sailing directly from and to Southampton, prepare to cram your case – there is no luggage limit! Take as many pieces of luggage as you need on board; simply make sure that each individual piece of luggage doesn’t exceed 23kg. No more sitting on your case.
3. You Have Thrown Your Arms Over The Ship And Re-enacted The Titanic Scene
It is 17 years since Leonardo DiCaprio took to our screens in Titanic, but that still doesn’t stop people coming over all Jack Dawson ‘king of the world’ the minute they step foot on a cruise ship. We thought Jack was a bit of a prat when he did it, but there really is something about having the ocean stretching out ahead of you that does make you feel like king of the world.
4. You Have Been Asked By A Fellow Passenger “How Much Did You Pay?”
Saver Fares, Select Price, late deals…which did you book? How much did you pay? How much on board credit? All popular topics of conversation on board a ship! Different fares bring with them different benefits, so while a late deal might be considerably cheaper than a Select Price fare, it may not always offer the best value.
5. You Over Indulged At Every Meal Because You Knew It Wouldn’t Cost You More
Like your food? You’re in the right place. All ships offer at least one main dining room, which is open for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Most ships also offer alternative dining areas, from self-service to silver service, à la carte venues, and snack bars (often open 24 hours). Some of the larger vessels have as many as 20 plus restaurants, ranging from Mediterranean to Japanese, steakhouses to celebrity chef collaborations (supplement may apply to eat in select alternative dining venues).
6. You Had A One Way Conversation With The Captain Speaking Over The Tanoy
Regular as clockwork, at least once a day, the Captain will greet his passengers with news of the ship’s course, port information and weather. Tune into his announcements on the TV or hear it boom around the decks. Even a seasoned cruiser can’t help but talk back, especially about the weather, but remember that sadly it’s a one-way tannoy only.
7. You Have Joined A Gym Without Having To Pay A Membership Fee
Did you know that the average cruiser puts on almost a stone in weight on a 14 night cruise? Staying fit and healthy is always important, and twenty minutes on the treadmill is so much more tempting when you’re running towards a sea view. Not got the motivation to go it alone? From yoga on the decks; to Zumba classes;
to rock climbing walls and surf simulators, there is something for everyone!
As cruise ships become larger, so too does the number of decks and the amount of stairs. Say goodbye to the lift and take the stairs for the duration of your cruise; you’ll be glad you did when you’re enjoying guilt-free deserts.
8. Watching A West End Show Is As Normal As Watching EastEnders On BBC1
Quantum of the Seas recently set sail on its inaugural voyage, taking with it what is rumoured to be the best ever Mamma Mia cast to perform the hit musical. With shows on board Royal Caribbean International’s fleet including “Chicago” (Allure of the Seas), “Hairspray” (Oasis of the Seas) and “Saturday Night Fever” (Liberty of the Seas), you’ll soon become accustomed to the very best entertainment on board.
Norwegian Cruise Line have brought the infamous Blue Man Group to the seas on board Norwegian Epic, with their performances lighting up the ship’s main theatre; an area twice as large as BMG’s home venue in New York City. If you thought cruise ship entertainment was all about dodgy cabaret and second-rate singers then think again; on board entertainment today is equalled only in the theatres of New York’s Broadway and London’s West End.
9. Even Though You Took The Kids It Feels Like They Weren’t There 95% Of The Time
A family cruise offers even more for kids than a land-based holiday. Cruise lines such as P&O Cruises, Royal Caribbean, Celebrity Cruises, Norwegian Cruise Line and Princess Cruises offer amazing children’s facilities, with dedicated pools, lounges and even children’s teas. Children’s clubs are available on board most cruise lines at no additional charge, with age appropriate activities for children from ages 2 to 17.
10. Visiting One Destination While On Holiday Just Doesn’t Cut The Mustard
If you’re anything like us you’ll have a serious case of wanderlust, without the annual leave entitlement to match! When you long to see the world but don’t have the funds or gap year to go travelling, a cruise is the next best thing. You’ll wake in a new port each day, and we don’t just mean cities and islands across the Caribbean and Mediterranean; cruising can explore Hong Kong, Singapore, Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Thailand, Cambodia, Canada, the USA…the list is endless. Plus, if it came to full board luxury accommodation on the seas or a budget hostel and endless train journeys we know which we would choose!
11. You Eat Out At A Five-Star Restaurant And You’re Shocked To Receive A Bill
Regardless of cruise line, great food always plays a starring role in a cruise holiday. Along with specialty dining restaurants with menus by such renowned names as James Martin, Marco Pierre White, Atul Kochhar and Jamie Oliver, the food served in complimentary restaurants on board is exceptional. Expect three course meals with exemplary service and attentive waiting staff – minus the bill that usually comes at the end of the meal at home.
12. You Get Into Bed And Expect A Tasty Chocolate On Your Pillow
Don’t get us wrong, we love a towel animal as much as the next person, but do you know what we love more? Chocolate. Cabin stewards will discreetly tend to your cabin each day, so you’ll always find it in shipshape condition. You’ll return to find your bed turned down, fresh clean towels, a sparkling bathroom and often a chocolate on your pillow. Wouldn’t it be nice to get all that done for you at home too! We can dream.
13. You Expect Your Suitcases Delivered To Your Room In Every Hotel Were You Stay
Forget hauling your luggage up countless stairs or scouring reception for a bellboy; when you cruise, porters will be on hand to load your luggage straight on to the ship. All you have to worry about is digging your swimwear out of your hand luggage and heading to the pool.
14. The Pool Or Beach Is Not The Only Option
Gorgeous land-based resorts offer unadulterated relaxation; the infinity pool and the turquoise seas are pretty tempting. However, there is only so much sunbathing and water volleyball one can do. Where land-based resort activities can be limited (towel art classes or fruit carving lessons anyone?) the facilities on board many cruise ships are vast and varied.
Anybody who recently read about our Quantum of the Seas visit will be well aware of the indoor skydiving, surfing and dodgems offered on board that particular ship. Whether you’re thinking circus school, spa days, cookery classes with James Martin, acting lessons with RADA graduates or ballroom dancing with the cast of Strictly Come Dancing, we guarantee you’ll be blown away by the activities and facilities on board.
15. Keeping The Whole Family Entertained The Entire Time Didn’t Seem Too Difficult
Keeping the kids entertained is hard work, especially with a limited budget, however everything they could possibly want is on board and waiting for their arrival. Huge TV’s and the latest games consoles? Check! Kid’s clubs with leaders so cool they’ll make Mum and Dad look really boring? Check! Food to please even the pickiest of eaters? Check! Family focused excursions to some of the best water parks in the world? Check!
16. You Expect All Wine Waiters To Top Up Your Glass Without Having To Ask
Forget having to attract the attention of busy waiters and then waiting 20 minutes for them to come back with your fresh glass of wine. Excellent service comes as standard on a cruise, with attentive waiters ready to refill your glass before you’ve even realised it’s even empty.
17. You Expect A Manicure, Massage And A New Hairstyle Before Every Night Out
You’ll find some of the finest spas in the world represented on today’s cruise ships, many of them offering treatment lists even more extensive than you see at home. With the kids making the most of the activities, you’re free to enjoy some me time. Craving a change? Head to the salon for a cut or colour, or even both.
18. You Struggle To Find Anything Half As Exciting As When You First Step On Board
The ship will become your home for duration of your holiday and boarding it for the first time is always exciting. Whether you’ve travelled on the cruise liner before or are on a brand new ship, the thrill of discovering new destinations and of sea days spent with varied activities and delicious dining remains the same.
19. You Realise That There Is Nothing More Refreshing Than Sea Air
Anyone who has been on a cruise will know that sea days are as much a part of your holiday as your days ashore are. A chance to relax around the pool, make the most of the activities and breathe in some of that fresh sea air.
20. You Have Planned Your Next While Still On Board
Cruising makes other holidays look a bit, well, boring. Wake up in the same place each day, tread the sands of the same beach, explore the same sites and eat the same foods.
We’re sorry to say that you’ll probably come back from your first cruise as one of those people who just won’t shut up about how good their holiday was. You’ll ramble about visiting a new destination each day, brag about seeing West End and Broadway shows for free, and moan that you couldn’t fit all the on board activities into your sea days because there were too many on offer. We’re sorry you’ll be that person and we’re sorry if it made you want to book another cruise before you had even stepped on dry land.